How to Handle Holiday Stress
by Cecilia Mullen, R.N.C., N.P.
November 18, 2000
The holidays are arriving soon. Does that countdown to "shopping days left" cause an intense feeling of impending doom instead of jubilation? Unless you are 5 years old, the holidays require a certain amount of preparation and time management. There can be family conflicts which arise every holiday. There can be painful memories associated with holidays for some. Particularly in this fast-paced environment we live in, we can become overwhelmed.
If you feel you are always "out of time" and it causes anxiety, change the way you manage your time. Gandhi once said, "There is more to life than just increasing its speed."
Time management allows you opportunities to reflect upon the pleasures and joys of life. First, identify how you spend the hours of the day. Perhaps keep a journal for a few days. Identify those activities in the day which cause you stress and anxiety and how much time spent at each task. Identify the task's purpose and if you completed the task. Be specific.
Next, evaluate if there is a more efficient way to accomplish those tasks to allow more relaxation time. Evaluate the value of each task. Is it useful or wasteful?
If a task is not completed it is wasted time and perhaps not an efficient use of your time. Can tasks be clustered together? Can you accomplish the task in a more pleasant environment or is it necessary at all?
For instance, buying gifts can be stressful, but is necessary. Can you arrange to cut back on list by a family "grab" or exchange, buying 1 larger gift for one individual instead of 5 gifts for the family? Choose a less crowded shopping time to avoid the stress of chaos. Awaken at 7 a.m. to shop early. Shop with a friend or meet a friend for lunch or brunch at the end of a shopping session. Plan ahead to save money or agree with family on a value of gifts which is within your means.
Is it really necessary to have a home decorated out of Better Homes and Gardens? A small tree or wreath would be sufficient if this would decrease your tasks. Delegate your tasks. You don't have to do everything yourself or to perfection.
Don't waste time on indecision. Know what you want to buy ahead of time, take a list (complete with price limits) and have a plan of attack. Leave small children at home if possible when shopping or curtail trips to shorter sessions.
Traveling can be stressful, especially during the holidays. Be prepared for delays. Bring books, CD's, letters to write. Sleep or nap when possible. Avoid rushing; it never seems to help anyway!
To reduce frustration ask yourself some questions:
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It is necessary to do this at all?
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Is it necessary to do this so frequently?
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What would happen if I didn't do it?
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Can someone else do it?
Develop strategies:
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Learn to prioritize tasks
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Delegate jobs.
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Learn to "go with the flow"
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Don't sweat the small stuff; it's all small stuff
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Enjoy the feeling of control over your life.
It all starts with one simple word... "no." You don't need to attend every party. You don't need to invite everyone to your home. You don't need to buy a gift for everyone you know. You don't need to fulfill your child's every wish.
Only perform those tasks which are important to you and you have given highest priority. Enjoy the moments of relaxation that you have created.
Happy Holidays from All of Us at Granite Medical!
Excerpts from this column were taken from "From Stress to Strength" by Dr. Robert S. Eliot.
Cecilia Mullen is a nurse practitioner at Granite Medical Group. The information in this column is not intended to diagnose individual conditions. Readers should see their own doctors about specific problems.